Recently I visited my in-laws and experienced one of my small nightmares. My brother-in-law had traveled abroad and brought gifts for the family and mine was a blouse. Picture of it is available in the post… well, needless to say that not liking the blouse I was left in the very difficult position: the white lie or the cruel truth? People who know me, know the answer: the truth. I tried in the friendliest way to be truthful about my feelings: I thanked him, and I really was thankful, I mean, he took the time to get me a gift when he was taking time to relax. It is BIG! However, not knowing me well (we live miles apart and meet once every 2 years), he bought me something that had nothing to do with my taste… I mean, my mom can’t buy me gifts! We lived 24 years together and I still would steal the clothes she bought for herself instead of using the ones she bought for me! (It practically doubled my wardrobe!)
Anyways, getting back to the subject: non-wanted gifts; as an organizer I always advocate for gift cards or asking the person for what they really want. In my opinion it saves time. Some people get upset for the lack of surprise, but I think that lack of surprise is better than the unpleasant surprise that the person didn’t like the gift.
Some “etiquette experts” say that is tacky to give money. Others that it is not nice to re-gift. My question is: What do they say about getting stuck with something that we don’t need, don’t like and don’t use? It is such a guilt trip!
I believe that we are here to be happy and the best way to do so is being free of anything that weighs us down. More often than not a client asks me about what to do with an unwanted item. I redirect the matter with the following question:
What do you think your mom (or whoever gave it to you) would want: you to be happy or to keep it?
By the way, the blouse is at the Goodwill now, hopefully someone will fall in love with it and they will have a beautiful story together .
